What is Metta Loving Kindness?
Metta (Pali) or maitrī (Sanskrit) is a Buddhist meditation practice and ethical quality centered on the cultivation of benevolence, loving-kindness, and unconditional goodwill toward oneself and all beings. The term refers to benevolence, loving-kindness, friendliness, amity, and good will, and is taught as a cultivated mental state in which attention and concern are directed toward the happiness of others. Within Buddhism, metta is the first of the four sublime states (Brahmaviharas), one of the ten pāramīs of Theravāda Buddhism, and expounded upon in the Metta Sutta.
Unlike transient emotions, metta is trained through the deliberate repetition of phrases such as “May I be happy” or “May you be safe.” The practice generally consists of silent repetitions of phrases directed at a person who, depending on tradition, may or may not be internally visualized. Practitioners progress through stages, directing metta first toward themselves, then a benefactor, a loved one, a neutral person, a difficult person, and ultimately all beings without exception.
Origins & Lineage
The Mettā-sutta on Loving Kindness originated in India around 2,500 years ago and it’s one of the most famous early Buddhist texts. The Karaṇīyamettā Sutta (commonly called the Metta Sutta) is found in the Suttanipāta (Sn 1.8) and Khuddakapāṭha (Khp 9). The teachings of the Buddha were transmitted orally for nearly five centuries before monks in Sri Lanka wrote them down in 29 B.C.E. in the Pali language.
Prior to the advent of the Buddha, there existed traditions of meditation with the four virtues of loving-kindness, compassion, empathetic joy, and equanimity, and the Buddhist scriptures acknowledge that the metta-concept containing four Brahmavihara meditation practices “did not originate within the Buddhist tradition.” Three of the four immeasurables are found in the later Upanishads, while all four are found with variations in Jainism literature, and the ancient Indian Paccekabuddhas mentioned in early Buddhist Suttas mention all “four immeasurables.”
A different set of practical instructions, still widely used today, is found in the 5th century CE Visuddhimagga by scholar-monk Buddhaghosa.
How It’s Practiced
Metta meditation is typically practiced seated in a quiet space for 15–30 minutes, though experienced practitioners integrate the attitude into daily life. The practice gradually increases in difficulty with respect to the targets that receive the practitioner’s compassion or loving-kindness, beginning with oneself, then loved ones, neutral ones, difficult ones, and finally all beings, with variations across traditions.
Practitioners begin by offering loving-kindness to themselves by repeating phrases such as “May I be safe, May I be healthy, May I be happy, May I be at ease, May I be filled with loving-kindness, May I be peaceful,” allowing ample space between each phrase. After establishing goodwill toward oneself, practitioners extend the same phrases to a benefactor, a loved one, a neutral person (such as a cashier or passerby), a difficult person (beginning with someone mildly irritating, not the person who hurt them most), and ultimately all beings everywhere.
Practitioners repeat phrases over and over, letting the feelings permeate body and mind, and the meditation may at times feel mechanical or awkward and can bring up feelings contrary to lovingkindness, feelings of irritation and anger. Teachers emphasize that the phrases are seeds being planted, not descriptions of current feeling states.
Metta Loving Kindness Today
In 1974, Sharon Salzberg co-founded the Insight Meditation Society at Barre, Massachusetts, with Jack Kornfield and Joseph Goldstein, with emphasis on vipassanā (insight) and mettā (loving-kindness) methods. Salzberg is among the first to bring mindfulness and lovingkindness meditation to mainstream American culture over fifty years ago, inspiring generations of meditation teachers and wellness influencers. In 1995 she published her best-known work, the metta meditation book Lovingkindness: The Revolutionary Art of Happiness.
Today, seekers encounter metta through 10-day silent retreats at centers such as the Insight Meditation Society, drop-in meditation classes at urban dharma centers, guided audio recordings on platforms like Insight Timer, and secular adaptations in clinical settings. Teachers such as Jack Kornfield, Tara Brach, Pema Chödrön, and Ayya Khema have each developed their own phrase variations and teaching approaches. Variations on traditional practice have been popularized by modern teachers and applied in modern research settings.
Common Misconceptions
Metta is not an emotion. These mental states are not emotions, nor is it possible to simply make up your mind you are going to be loving, compassionate, empathetic and balanced from now on. It is a trained capacity that requires consistent practice.
It does not demand that you like everyone. Metta is not about manufacturing affection for people who have harmed you. Loving-kindness doesn’t ask us to love every person we meet; it is realizing how interconnected all of our lives are. The practice trains the capacity to wish well-being for all beings, even when personal fondness is absent.
It is not the same as compassion. Metta is often paired with karuna, compassion; karuna is the active, heartfelt concern for the suffering of others. Metta is goodwill; compassion responds to suffering.
Starting with yourself is not mandatory. Some people find lovingkindness for themselves so hard, they begin their practice with a benefactor, and teachers suggest it may be better to first tap into wishes of love and care by calling them up for someone “easy”: a small child, a beloved mentor, even a pet.
The “near enemy” of metta is attachment. The “far enemy” of mettā is hate or ill-will; the “near enemy” is attachment (greed): here too one likes experiencing a virtue, but for the wrong reason.
How to Begin
Begin with Sharon Salzberg’s Lovingkindness: The Revolutionary Art of Happiness (Shambhala, 1995) or Jack Kornfield’s guided metta meditation instructions available free on his website. For audio guidance, search “Sharon Salzberg metta” on Insight Timer or listen to Tara Brach’s guided recordings.
Start with 10 minutes daily, directing phrases only toward yourself or a benefactor for the first week. Do not force feeling; let the phrases be a steady rhythm. If irritation or grief arises, this is not failure—it is the practice revealing what has been stored. Return to the breath, soften, and begin again.